The old has gone, and the new is here. And, quite frankly, I’m glad. 2023 was a doozy. Death, cancer, ill health, ER visits, a bomb threat at school, allergic reactions, unexpected financial expenses––the foundations of our house slipped, and we had to restabilize the whole house. Consequently, the dollars flew from our bank account, leaving us tightening the budget even further.
I’m not the only one who had a rough year. Friends were in accidents, jobs lost, unexpected pregnancies, and relationships that should’ve lasted forever ended.
Tired, worn out, scared, overwhelmed. My friends uttered these words to me, words I also yelled, screamed, and whimpered to God. Yet, I had other friends who soared. I saw them achieve success after years of waiting, promises from God were fulfilled, and delight rippled through conversations as new opportunities and fun times came their way. I celebrated and laughed with them. But, then occasionally, amid my situations, I’d cry to God, “What about me, Lord? When’s my turn?”
Jealousy.
To be fair, this emotion didn’t last long when it came. I was too happy for my friends as there is something about celebrating others; it exposes our hearts, minds, and souls to their joy. This exposure lifts our hearts, minds, and souls from worry to delight, even if only for a moment.
But, it wasn’t just jealousy of them. I was jealous that God wasn’t blessing me. I was fed up with saying to the world, “I’m blessed.” Because, honestly, I didn’t feel blessed even if the bible says I was. The Bible tells us repeatedly we’re blessed and favored:
For you, Lord, bless the righteous one;
you surround him with favor like a shield. Proverbs 5:12 CSB
For the one who finds me finds life
and obtains favor from the Lord. Proverbs 8:35 CSB
Blessed is the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavens in Christ. Ephesians 1:3 CSB
In the Christian world, I’ve heard people be almost blase with this truth. It almost feels like they don’t know how to cope with your hard times, so when they say, “But, you’re still blessed!” An unspoken “So be happy” also hangs in the air.
Over the past month, I’ve been mulling this repeatedly as I try to process my past year and those closest to me. What I found is this:
Nowhere in the bible does being blessed or favored equate with being happy.
I sat dumbstruck as I realized how I’d gently and blithely slipped into the association that blessed were the things in the world that made me happy. For example, health, success, a life without problems, achievement, happy and thriving kids, a great marriage, a life without problems … did I already say that? Yet, I have associated being blessed with all of the above.
I’ve posted every Thanksgiving, Christmas, and more times than I can count how blessed I am alongside pictures of my happy family, anniversary, friends, educational degrees or achievements, etc. And deep in these social media posts, there is a truth: I AM blessed because of those things. But they don’t always make me happy. I LOVE my family and friends … but they take work.
How often do you see someone post a picture of their cancer-stricken mom and say, “I am blessed.” Or next to their daughter as they sit in the ER because their mental health is so bad you’ve been walking the streets with them at 3 AM because they can’t sleep because of suicidal thoughts and say, “I’m blessed.” Or say, “I’m recovering from addiction, and I’m blessed.”
Claiming that you are blessed in these situations goes against what the world thinks of as blessed.
Yet … Job.
Job is the man who, in the word of God, the Bible, lost everything––wife, kids, livelihood, friends, health, and wealth. You name it; it was taken from him by Satan with the permission of God.
Even Satan recognized that Job was blessed;
Satan answered the Lord, “Does Job fear God for nothing? Haven’t you placed a hedge around him, his household, and everything he owns? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. Job 1:9-10 CSB
And Satan identifies all the blessings of Job’s life. It would be easy to read this and focus on the visible blessings of Job’s life. But Satan knew the true meaning of blessed, which was used in this context. In Greek, blessed is ‘Makarios.’ Translated, this means possessing the favor of God. So unquestionably, to be blessed is to have the kingdom of God in our hearts. That is what makes us blessed.
That is why, in the most challenging moments of our lives, we should declare to our friends and family, “I AM blessed.”
I am blessed when I am diagnosed with a health issue.
I am blessed when I have two dollars left in the bank account.
I am blessed when I declare bankruptcy.
I am blessed when I fight addiction.
The list is endless.
We also see this with Job. When he lost everything, was he still blessed? Yes!
When my mom was diagnosed with cancer this year, was I still blessed? Yes, because Jesus brings the kingdom of God to my heart.
Were we still blessed when we spent thousands of dollars on foundation work for our home? Yes, because Jesus brings the kingdom of God to the hearts of my family.
When the mom walked her daughter around the local neighborhood at 3 AM to distract her from suicidal thoughts, was she and her daughter still blessed? Yes, because Jesus brings the kingdom of God to their hearts.
Was the woman who went to Alcoholics Anonymous last night for the first time still blessed? Yes, because Jesus brings the kingdom of God to her heart.
Was the friend who celebrated a book deal after losing her husband still blessed? Yes, because Jesus brings the kingdom of God to her heart.
Was the teenage girl who fell pregnant unexpectedly blessed? Yes, because Jesus brings the kingdom of God to the heart of her and her baby.
The world pushes the message that happiness is all that matters. And if we aren’t happy, we’re failing; if we’re not happy, we’re not blessed. This is a lie that many, including myself, have bought into.
To be blessed is to have the kingdom of God in our hearts. All who know and have accepted Jesus have it. Therefore, all of us are equally and beyond blessed. When we look at others and wish for their blessing, we must ask ourselves why and bring that question to God. He knows the path even if we don’t understand the purpose of this season. God never promised us an easy life. But, he did promise us suffering;
I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace. You will have suffering in this world. Be courageous! I have conquered the world.” John 16:33
So, take heart: the season you are in will end. But, what won’t pass away is that God gave his son, Jesus, to give us access to the kingdom of God on earth as it is in heaven. That is our blessing. And that is why when we reflect on the hard years, we can declare to all who know us: I am blessed, even if we’d sooner rather forget the wounds and hurts it caused.
A love letter from God …
Dear lovely one,
You are blessed. I’m going to repeat it: You are blessed. I love you, and I’m with you always. This past year was filled with highs and lows, some you’d love to repeat, others you’d sooner forget, but each served a purpose. You may not fully understand what that purpose was, but I do.
Remember, those around you may push the message that happiness is all that matters. And if we aren’t happy, we’re failing. And if we’re not happy, we’re not blessed. This is a lie; don’t buy into it. You are always blessed because you possess my favor.
I see you, my beloved; I love you.
And, I am with you always.
Love, God